The Hunt of the Heroes

    It started out with a simple sentence: "Hey, Mat, can we have a quest?"
That was enough. At this time, I had seduced the elixer vendor with evil 
charms and had him as my slave. He was following me mindlessly through the
good *shudder* city of Waterdeep. I had my eyes set on the Halruuan 
trader, whose goods I wanted. The elixer vendor came as muscle.
Cyberchrist, the mighty hero, was the one that had just gossiped the 
aforementioned statement to the patron saint of Quests, Mat. The Land of 
Landsverge has been fine for some time and Cyberchrist was sort of out 
of work. We all felt it. We needed adventure.  And Lo, in a deep, booming 
voice, Mat replied, "*think*". And later, "where should the quest take 
place?"

   And so it began.

   Ganthar, the mighty hunter, was hunting down the poor denizens of the 
Canyon Elemental. He was backed by death dogs. He gossiped "BWAHAHAHAA!! 
You heroes think you're all that? Stop me!!" as he lopped the head off of
the Magneto.  At this time, I was deep into the battle with the Halruuan 
trader. The battle was not going so well with the vendor, as he is a 
horrible fighter. Thus I came back to Kemo to charm four more weak 
willed Kemo guards to assist the dark side. I had charmed two of the 
four guards when the Message Citadel (which tells the time through 
ticks, and informs us) displayed a horrible message in its neon board:

\c02INFO: Mercer has been slain.\c00

   I gasped up at the board in shock. Mercer, accomplice and right hand man 
of Cyberchrist? Couldn't be. But it was, in that dazzling, wicked pink. 
I had not known Mercer well, only knew that he followed the paths of 
nuetrality, and could thus be converted to evil. But then I realized 
that Mercer must be mostly good, as he led the goody two-shoe group 
Rapture for a time.  Powerful as he is, I thought it best to leave him 
to his devices. Mat may be the patron diety of quests, but he is also 
mad as a hatter, let me tell you. His adventures ofttimes end up with 
multiple corpses of the same person piled up high in places. 

   I went to the temple with my guards. What I saw was a sight. 
Cyberchrist was suffering from greivious wounds. He uttered one word 
through  trembling lips. "Marbles."

   I found out later through the gossip that Ganthar had used marbles to 
stop fleeing heroes. The death dogs had then massacred them. Well done, 
Ganthar, I thought.

   I had the dark cleric Nitres heal me up and left, back to Waterdeep.
By this time, the three main questors were Ferro, Cyberchrist, and Mercer 
(who had evidently got his eq back). Thier healers were pulling double
shifts to patch them up. Well, that's what they get, I thought.
Upon reaching Waterdeep, I found the battle still in full swing. But, as I
ordered the guards to kill the trader, he suddenly finished the vendor and
turned on me. 
 
   I barely escaped with my life, limping back to Kemo, bleeding from a 
dozen wounds. I had Nitres heal me. It was then that I noticed the 
commotion in the temple. 

   The warriors were coming and going, complaining about injuries, and 
begging for the now dearly-departed healer to return. But alas, with no 
healer, the warriors' friends and clerics were the only source of 
rejuvenation. The Quest-Diety Mat took pity on the warriors at times, 
assisting the warriors with that wonderful feeling known as the 
God-Heal. It was times like these, after the God-Heals, that the 
warriors got second winds and rushed back to the canyon, Banzaiing all 
the way. At this point, I had decided to take a look at the war effort 
myself, although I am no fighter. 

   I ascended the mountain by flight. Elemental Canyon is notorious
for tiring out would-be adventurers, leaving them to die on the cliffs. 
I had to conserve my energy, for I am a mage and not robust. As I stood 
on the summit, I could see nothing--just a bunch of dust. It didn't look 
like the dust cloud creature, though. I crept a little closer, up to the 
elemental gateway.

   Ganthar was there, hee-hawing at his apparent victory while driving his 
sword through the elemental guardian. The guardian crumpled like an old 
coat.

   Presently I heard a snarl behind me, and looked over my shoulder, a 
spell of meteor shower on my lips.   I never got to finish it. 
The Death Dog ripped into me, biting and clawing. I stood there, trying 
to cast my spell, fumbling in my heart shaped box for a scroll of  
recall, and waving my Black Xyden's Sword about at the same time. At 
that time, something in my mind snapped, and I fled, and tripped over a 
corpse some 40 yards away.

   I landed in a pile of equipment, and would have taken it under different 
circumstances. But the Death Dog's grinning visage was right behind me, 
and I had no time. I produced a scroll of recall out of my box and read 
the magical symbols, leaving the Dog a snarling and rabid mess as his 
kill got away.

   It was then that I knew how serious the situation was. I had also known 
that it was going to be that way, though, as it was a Mat (TM) brand 
quest. I thought, "hey--Cyberchrist can kill the Efreeti, Lord Suzeran, 
and the Ghenna swordmaster. I'm sure he can take a wimp like Ganthar."

   Cyberchrist appeared in the middle of the room, along with Mercer and 
Ferro.  It turned out that the Death Dogs had torn all three of them up, 
and I knew why: Without a healer, a hero's power is limited. I ordered 
Nitres to heal Cyberchrist to the best of his ability, but Nitres has a 
measured mana capacity of 273, which is fine for a mage, but for an 
almighty hero, won't cut it. I contemplated going back to the canyon, 
helping the warriors out, but then decided against it. Let it play out, I 
thought. CC can handle it.

   Nonchalantly I went back to the canyon wall, convinced the vendor to 
work for Kil'rath'as' will again, and went to the chessboard, intending 
to boost my -348 mana on down a bit. 

   As I trekked back to Kemo, I heard Mat's voice in my head say, "Why 
aren't you helping?" I replied, using my inherant ESP, "Because I have 
better things to do and don't have a deathwish." Lame excuse. I was 
scared. After seeing what was happening to Cyberchrist, Mercer, and 
Ferro, I decided I didn't want the same thing to happen to me.

   I would not have had any part in the adventure had it not been for 
Ferro. He asked me, "Can we use the elixer vendor?" "No," I replied. 
"I'm using him." Ah, but I would have helped, had it not been for fear. 
Ferro dug in and pleaded, but I remained adamant. Finally he stopped.

\c02INFO: Mercer has been slain.\c00

   The message rocked me just as hard as the first one had. Harder, even.
I swayed a little, and the elixer vendor caught me. It was a slaughter. 
No, it was freakin' WAR. This Ganthar was no ordinary man to be able to 
give Cyberchrist such a run for his money. I told Ferro, "Alright, I'll 
help.  But if I die, it's on your head."

   Nitres patched up Cyberchrist as best as he could. We were ready for the 
run down to the canyon. I removed my AliasMaker9000 from my robe pocket, 
and punched in the alias, "22 order fol kill Ganthar". Nitres was in 
need of rest himself, after healing me and casting that wondrous cleric 
spell known only as "Sanctuary" upon me. We couldn't be any more 
ready..or so we thought. 

   For Lo, the clouds parted, and the glory that was Mat shined down upon 
us all, as we experienced yet another God-Heal. We were ready, 
willing..and able.  We arrived at the canyon, I flying beside Cyberchrist. 
Ferro was at the right hand of Cyberchrist, as Mercer was currently 
indisposed. We descended into the Canyon Elemental.

   Ganthar once again greeted us at the entrance. The dogs all went for 
Cyberchrist. That was the plan, though, as his armor held them off long 
enough for me to punch into my AliasMaker9000 two numbers: 22.

"But no-one is fighting him!"

   It malfunctioned again. Cursing, I tried to recalibrate, but then 
realized this was not the time nor place. The battle was intense. 
Cyberchrist and Ferro's blades crossed with Ganthar's, making ringing 
hollow noises. Death Dogs came at Cyberchrist and Ferro at all sides. 
Ganthar, in a sneaky move, dropped some marbles. Cyberchrist deftly 
picked them up (I suspect he still has them; these should be put in the 
Waterdhavian museum as a reminder of the viscious battle fought here). 
Finally, Cyberchrist and Ferro fled the battle, after taking many 
serious hits. I, too, fled, but not before making the vendor, in a 
direct order, "attack the dogs". 

   Blood spurting from my shoulder where a dog had bitten me, and a sword 
slash along my ribs, I relocated through a haze of pain to an Enforcer. 
I killed him and went back to the temple of Kemo.

   I grinned. "The vendor is now, even as we speak, killing the dogs," I 
said. "All you gotta do now is go and assist him."

   There were cheers, up until Ganthar gossiped, "HAHAHA!! The vendor is 
dead.  I guess he wasn't a good tank after all."  I slumped on the 
ground, my face in my hands. It had all been for nothing, then. 

   Cyberchrist and Ferro made one more run. But only Cyberchrist came back, 
once again looking like raw hamburger. He looked wobbly; he was leaning 
on his sword to support himself. I looked at him, then looked away, 
flinching.

   One of the death dogs had chewed his arm to the bone; skin hung off of 
the pale blue humorus. His greaves were totaled, exposing bloody slashes 
along his legs. Even his gauntlets looked like hobo gloves. But his 
face--words cannot describe what I saw there. It was the face of a man 
that would stick his foot up the behind of the devil himself and dare 
him to do something. It was the face of a man that has been through hell 
and come back, on the other side of grace.  It was the face of a man 
that, although he looked like a pet chew toy, was gonna go back and kill 
Ganthar-- one last time. 

   Ferro. Where was Ferro? Cyberchrist evidently wondered this too, because 
he limped out of the temple, moaning and leaning on his sword, towards 
Elemental Canyon. Ferro was not dead; we'd had no information to prove 
this. But  he had been gone too long. I began to wonder if I should help 
Cyberchrist, for if he went back, he would surely be killed. Then:

"He's dead!"

   It struck me, all of us I think, like a bolt out of the blue. Ferro had 
evidently killed Ganthar. I cheered. There was dancing in the streets. 
Cyberchrist, wincing, came back to the temple for heals. We had - or 
should I say, the warriors had - killed Ganthar and ended the threat to 
Elemental Canyon.  Indeed, ended a threat to this world--had Ganthar 
lived, who knows what epic battles he and Ki'rath'as  might have fought 
for control of the world.

   Mercer went back to the canyon to find his prizmatic bracelet missing. 
It was later found on an imp who had palmed it.

   Ferro and Cyberchrist continue to adventure, and with Mercer, thier 
business CC&M thrives. Cyberchrist and Co. were fully healed, and 
Cyberchrist is still a kicker of behinds But that look stays in his face 
today.

   Ganthar and his death dogs now reside in the Inferno. A superb career 
move.

   And me? Why, I just stay up late at nights, studying arcane notes, and 
thinking about my next quest to post on the clan board. I'm still evil, 
and was reprimanded by Kil'rath'as for assisting the forces of good. But 
hey--I got a new voodoo totem. Heh.

"When the world's problems become one, a savior shall emerge.."
					     -Fist of the North Star